The nation watched in amusement this week as Republicans laid out their plans promised an April Fool’s Day Budget complete with incomprehensible Kindergarten garbage they call charts. Some of us laughed. I hope that some of us cried; certainly, were I a conservative Republican, tears would be my reaction at the ineptitude of my so-called “leadership”.

But if you were like me, the presentation of such pre-adolescent tomfoolery was deeply offensive in a way that seemed to elude immediate articulation. Offensive in such a way that even outright mockery seemed insufficient in response.

After a day’s contemplation, I think I understand. The offense lies in the juvenility of the response; the utter rejection of seriousness as even a pretended modus operandi for one of our two great political parties; the seeming abdication of any real responsibility for actual participation in the purported governance of our great nation.

But more even than that, it lies in the brazenness of the GOP’s assumption that anyone with a sensible eye toward policy outcomes is even interested in their ideas or “solutions” at this point.

The GOP has been grounded. They trashed the American house, flooded the basement, broke nearly every piece of furniture we own, went on a spending spree with the parents’ credit card pretty much forcing us into bankruptcy while handing out party favors to their friends , and should by all rights be locked up in Juvie for assorted crimes petty and great.

And the American People said Enough. You’re grounded. Go to your room and don’t come out until you think about what you’ve done. Oh, and while you’re at it you can start by cleaning your room.

Because these proud ignoramuses can’t even get their own act together. Their own leader pwns himself on national television again and again, then says it was all part of some secret diabolical plan on his own part. The Republican Idol is a drug-addicted legend-in-his-own-mind radio star with an approval rating lower than dirt. Someone should seriously ask the GOP whether, if all their friends went out and jumped off a cliff, they would, too. Heck, these are people so emotionally stunted they’ve got posters of Chuck Freaking Norris hanging over their beds and Ayn Rand drivel on their bookshelves to make them feel tougher than their real emo, weepy, tantrum-throwing selves. The rest of us grew out of that phase when we turned 14. They can’t even manage to clean up their own backyard. And don’t even get me started on your girlfriend Sarah. The only person who sees starbursts when they look at her is you. It’s just…pathetic.

And these punks think anyone wants to hear anything they have to say? Why? As any responsible parent knows, respect is earned. And these two-bit jokers haven’t earned a shred of it. I mean, seriously now…Joe the Plumber? Dungeons and Dragons nerds live in a fantasy world more realistic than that.

The sheer notion that these delinquent ne’er-do-wells would interrupt adults attempting to fix the messes they created to take a gander at their cartoon drawings isn’t risible. It’s infuriating.

Just…go to your room, GOP. Don’t come out until you’ve had a chance to put on that dunce cap that suits you so well, think about all the damage you’ve done, and atone for it. You might want to try cleaning yourself up a bit and straightening your own room while you’re at it.